Do Good Looks Bring More Perks, or More Pain?

July 10, 2008

Some people think they have it rough. And then there are the preternaturally attractive, some of who claim that being beautiful is its own burden. They insist that because of their looks, they aren't taken seriously, that they're ignored, and that their self-esteem has suffered. "Nobody talks to you," says one woman of her plight. "Nobody wants to take you out."

While I think people do make assumptions upon appearance, let's be honest: I think beautiful people experience more perks than problems. What do you think? Is it difficult to be really, really, ridiculously good looking? And are there any assumptions — positive or negative — that you have about the physically attractive?

Source

Bella Poll

72 Comments

3 years 9 weeks

pain... i'm not bad looking..am beautiful ...sometimes when i walk in a shopping mall or somewhere i get attention from ppl..especially men..yes sometimes women do admire my look ":D.. i dont know how to deal with it.., am pretty shy and i get nervous..also i have 6 step sisters from my dad,, they do are bad looking..they get jealous of me and they dont even treat me well.. i feel really bad.. also my fiance gets jealous bcuz of the attention ii get from ppl.its not my fault for having a pretty face and eyes ..its fucking pathetic sorry for the bad language am having a bad terrible day. /rant :(

3 years 39 weeks

Beauty can be a burden. Have you ever been told 'WOW! I like your ....(looks)' over and over? It might be nice to start with.. but it gets annoying after a while. But the truth of the matter is ... you can't tell a good person from a bad one simply from their looks. The other thing is .... beauty does not last. Look at their grandparents...

keiraz 4 years 45 weeks

It does especially in work places!!

chiquita29 4 years 45 weeks

I agree with you KathleenxCouture!

Surferchic95 4 years 45 weeks

Retro Bunny Austerity I totally agree with you guys... I am naturally a friendly person but I find it hard to always have to smile when I am entering somewhere...or the unwanted attention is def NOT a perk... I love the fact that I was not born ugly or something but I hate that people assume that you are not smart-I have a 3.8 GPA and am treated like a "dumb beauty"... You know what I hate the most though? the fact that guys are coming up to my LITTLE BROTHER to try to pry info about me out of him...oh and the fact that I get stared down by guys that are way older than me! I mean I know I look good but please don't call me "Baby"..

Surferchic95 4 years 45 weeks

Retro BunnyAusterityI totally agree with you guys...I am naturally a friendly person but I find it hard to always have to smile when I am entering somewhere...or the unwanted attention is def NOT a perk...I love the fact that I was not born ugly or something but I hate that people assume that you are not smart-I have a 3.8 GPA and am treated like a "dumb beauty"...You know what I hate the most though? the fact that guys are coming up to my LITTLE BROTHER to try to pry info about me out of him...oh and the fact that I get stared down by guys that are way older than me! I mean I know I look good but please don't call me "Baby"..

KathleenxCouture 4 years 45 weeks

Bella has posted these kinds of blogs before and of course there are people that will say "yes, i believe i am beautiful" and then there are the others who say its not humble enough for them to say that but it really does all boil down to personality. I was just simply stating that sometimes I find it harder for people to want to get to know me initially because of my looks but when I strike up convos with them they are surprised at how pleasant and funny I am. And I'm not saying im gods gift to man or that EVERYONE thinks i'm pretty. I am happy with the way I look and I consider myself to be quite attractive. I also think I have a great personality but is that so wrong? Is it wrong to celebrate my happiness with myself once in a while? I don't think saying "yes, i consider myself to be attractive" to be self-absorbed or snotty or make me less of a good person. I think everyone should find the good in themselves and what they think makes them beautiful and celebrate it because in the end its what and how you feel about yourself that matters because everyone has a different way of interpreting beauty. Some societies and cultures have very specific ways of perceiving beauty so to each his/her own.

KathleenxCouture 4 years 45 weeks

Bella has posted these kinds of blogs before and of course there are people that will say "yes, i believe i am beautiful" and then there are the others who say its not humble enough for them to say that but it really does all boil down to personality. I was just simply stating that sometimes I find it harder for people to want to get to know me initially because of my looks but when I strike up convos with them they are surprised at how pleasant and funny I am.And I'm not saying im gods gift to man or that EVERYONE thinks i'm pretty. I am happy with the way I look and I consider myself to be quite attractive. I also think I have a great personality but is that so wrong? Is it wrong to celebrate my happiness with myself once in a while? I don't think saying "yes, i consider myself to be attractive" to be self-absorbed or snotty or make me less of a good person. I think everyone should find the good in themselves and what they think makes them beautiful and celebrate it because in the end its what and how you feel about yourself that matters because everyone has a different way of interpreting beauty. Some societies and cultures have very specific ways of perceiving beauty so to each his/her own.

LadyLiLa83 4 years 45 weeks

I think if you're a b*tch, no matter what you LOOK like, you're ugly.

austerity 4 years 45 weeks

totally agree with you on the last few lines. Few people are going to measure the symmetry of your nose when you're confident, cute and fun to be with.

yellowbanana 4 years 45 weeks

I would definitely say that there are more perks to being conventionally beautiful. I'm definitely not perfect but I am pretty cute. I've never gone to a job interview and not gotten the job. This could be attributed to other factors as well...I'm hardworking, conversational, I know what people usually want to hear. But having good genes I'm sure helps. That said, there are downsides. A lot of people assume I'm not smart. Guys think they have the right to hit on me just because I'm there. Can I also just say that everyone has a different idea of beauty. And taking care of yourself makes a HUGE difference, as well as projecting confidence and smiling a lot.

yellowbanana 4 years 45 weeks

I would definitely say that there are more perks to being conventionally beautiful. I'm definitely not perfect but I am pretty cute. I've never gone to a job interview and not gotten the job. This could be attributed to other factors as well...I'm hardworking, conversational, I know what people usually want to hear. But having good genes I'm sure helps.That said, there are downsides. A lot of people assume I'm not smart. Guys think they have the right to hit on me just because I'm there.Can I also just say that everyone has a different idea of beauty. And taking care of yourself makes a HUGE difference, as well as projecting confidence and smiling a lot.

ashleykins 4 years 45 weeks

It all boils down to your personality anyway. No matter how beautiful you may be, or think you may be, a bad attitude makes you ugly. Vis Versa.

ashleykins 4 years 45 weeks

It all boils down to your personality anyway. No matter how beautiful you may be, or think you may be, a bad attitude makes you ugly. Vis Versa.

Retro Bunny 4 years 45 weeks

Shopper90210 Me-ow! ;D How can we be sure that only 5% of the population is beautiful? Lame, I know, but I don't really find anyone particularly unattractive! And in defense of my very insecure teenage ego, I don't find myself "attractive". I find myself homely looking. I was simply making a comment about being tall&blonde, nothing more or nothing less. :D And I think your whole situation depends on your attitude too. If you're positively confident about whatever looks you have, you'll project that onto other people.

Retro Bunny 4 years 45 weeks

Shopper90210Me-ow! ;DHow can we be sure that only 5% of the population is beautiful? Lame, I know, but I don't really find anyone particularly unattractive!And in defense of my very insecure teenage ego, I don't find myself "attractive". I find myself homely looking. I was simply making a comment about being tall&blonde, nothing more or nothing less.:DAnd I think your whole situation depends on your attitude too. If you're positively confident about whatever looks you have, you'll project that onto other people.

BlooBayoo 4 years 45 weeks

Remember, pretty has a shelf life (Sofia Loren aside) and most people know that. I'd rather be a regular Jane and know that the people who love me do so because of who I am rather than always wonder if the people around me really saw me for who I was rather than the reflected glory of being by my side.

BlooBayoo 4 years 45 weeks

JaimeLeah526 4 years 45 weeks

Come on. I've heard Jessica Alba and Michelle Phiefer complain about how hard it is to be beautiful in Hollywood. Personally, I think both are too stuck on themselves and there are far more beautiful actresses out there who still manage to get parts. It's a lot easier to make a beautiful person ugly for the camera but it's not as easy to make an average looking girl beautiful.

austerity 4 years 45 weeks

Sorry, that doesn't apply to me. If I were a biatch, I wouldn't be having the friends and fun I have. I'm always the first to say 'hiiii, how ya doing' and I can't help it if I get a 'hmph' in return. I talk to everybody because I believe life is too short to be shallow or arrogant. I also easily acknowledge someone who is prettier or more stylish than me; I believe I can learn from these ladies. Sure I'll have a 'damn, she's prettier than me!' initially but that's not going to affect my behavior towards them if they are nice people. But I'm not going to apologize for being aware of having great looks and figure and sexiness myself. It's easier to post about it on a forum, I wouldn't say all of this stuff out loud.

austerity 4 years 45 weeks

Sorry, that doesn't apply to me. If I were a biatch, I wouldn't be having the friends and fun I have. I'm always the first to say 'hiiii, how ya doing' and I can't help it if I get a 'hmph' in return. I talk to everybody because I believe life is too short to be shallow or arrogant. I also easily acknowledge someone who is prettier or more stylish than me; I believe I can learn from these ladies. Sure I'll have a 'damn, she's prettier than me!' initially but that's not going to affect my behavior towards them if they are nice people.But I'm not going to apologize for being aware of having great looks and figure and sexiness myself. It's easier to post about it on a forum, I wouldn't say all of this stuff out loud.

shopper90210 4 years 45 weeks

Its funny how quick people posted about how "beautiful" they were and how hard it is. Maybe 5% of the population is attractive so I doubt all of you "hot blondes" are really so. People probably dont like you bc you have a bad attitude and are a snob. Not because you are "beautiful".

austerity 4 years 45 weeks

Oh and in the article: I don't understand the logic of how men don't ask you out if you're beautiful. Of course they do, more so. Damn, is Carolynn Thelemaque supposed to be extremely good-looking? Nothing special imho :P but looks good for her age

austerity 4 years 45 weeks

The worst thing about it is that a lot of girls decide to hate you on sight. You enter a room, you get the up-and-down and the green look, and can expect no friendship. You know where you're at when good-looking girls and guys DON'T give you that kind of behavior.Worst story for me was when had a roommate who made my life HELL after giving me the up-and-down. I can safely say I did everything to be nice to her from the start. But yeah, she wasn't much to look at and trying to lose weight. I put two and two together and stopped trying after a while. Thank God I'm no longer in that house. Moreover if you're naturally beautiful (rather than attractive through very good grooming), girls hate you more. Second-worst problem: People think that because you're beautiful, you must be either dumb, arrogant, or both. If you look good, your you simply cannot be having a 3.8 GPA; you must be cheating your way up. And oh! you could never be good at math. How ignorant to stereotype like this. I think people should stop stereotyping and be open to the fact that someone can be beautiful and smart too, without losing their head in jealousy. I think there's a 'range' where beauty is more of a perk and after a certain level it gets more problematic. On the whole though, the benefits are obvious and I'd still pick beauty over average looks :P .

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